I can't possibly say anything that has never been said before. Call it my ignorance but i've never read one convincing piece of work which made me smile because it touched my heart. I look around and i think twice before blaming men for not bringing enough women issues into the light. Nobody cares. Women are equally eager to quickly hide inconvenient incidents in thier subconscious, to ask their own daughters to become immune and to do it as early as possible. They are so oblivious that they themselves preech silent obedience. They despise any form of rebellion. They scare you into believeing that it will never change and for that reason alone, everything almost becomes...fair.
Throughout history, one hasto dig deep to find traces of any women who did something significant. You can count them on your fingers if you tried. Has it always been this way? Being an athiest, i guess i have the tendency to blame everything on religion. But correct me if i'm wrong. Religion IS to blame. Religion says 'Hey that guy before me hit her with slippers thrice. I just slapped her once.' No one thought along the way that the slap still existed. Not even women.
A rape case requires 3 male witnesses. Or maybe 2. Doesnt matter anyway.
I have never lived abroad but people tell me it's better there. I can thus only tell you what i see and experience evey single day here in Pakistan. I wake up with my phone on silent untill my dad leaves for work. Girls getting msgs all the time is highly suspicious. I stay inside the house with the curtains closed because labourers work in the house facing ours. They might see me walking around the house which can be a disgrace. I take refuge inside a bedroom because the driver hasto come in for a second to check the switches. I go to the market next door while men sitting comfortably in their lawns under the sun stare from head to toe. I keep my eyes down and wear a serious expression. A smile or laughter among girls can suggest we are up for anonymous sex. I go out shopping and they stare, make comments and even touch you mistakenly if they're feeling confident enough. If i've bin out, i come home, wash my makeup and change clothes before my dad arrives. If i get late, i delete all pictures of my strictly female friends from my camera, just incase he decides to check it. If he finds out, he goes to my mother. shouts at her a little and tells her to keep an eye on me. Then he covers it all with a facade before he faces me again. The lovable, understanding dad act. Whose daughter can never do anything wrong. like having friends who wear sleeveless. All this, and i belong to an upper middle class family.
Men can never know what it's like to be a women. Most women don't know either. You only know you're miserable when you have known something better. Women all around me are slaves and they don't even know it. Sometimes i feel they know. They know it can't possibly be right. But they're scared about what it would mean if they admitted it. It might mean you're anti religion. Or worst still, an improper woman.
I cringe and i whine not because it's unfair but because there is nothing i can do about it. I see how my brothers are allowed all that im denied and yet i wear a dumb expression on my face and abstain from saying anything at all. I wish to scream and throw things about but that would get me nowhere. I've tried talking to my father but they all put up a wall and pretend they don't get it. He broke my heart into pieces that day. I can't run away with no money and no degree in my hand. I can't get married to escape my father because marriage is another cage, just larger. I'm left with no options. No ways to vent my anger and let it flow so it would not hamper my judgment and rational thinking.
i wish to become one of those who spend thier life reading and learning. All for themselves. Never marry.Never bother anyone. With no boundries and no rules. What are the chances i'll become that person?
I sometimes sit and wonder why we ended up this way. Why have we accepted this fate as a perminent part of society? Why it is passed down from generation to generation? Women lack in physical strenth as compared to men. I believe this led us to where we stand now. Physical strenth gives a person a feeling of self confidence. Incases where someone weaker then you exists, it gives the feeling of dominence aswell. Its not that she was not mentally as capable as men. It's just that men could not allow her to question their authority. she bowed down because words could not hit back as hard. Physical abuse could not be beared just because the right thing had to be said. She gave up. We all gave up.
